When someone is dealing with complex PTSD, it is important to be mindful of what you say. There are certain things that can trigger a negative reaction or set back their progress. Here are some things to avoid saying to someone with complex PTSD:
1. “It’s all in your head.”
This invalidates the person’s experiences and can make them feel like they are going crazy. It can also make them feel like they are not believed or supported.
2. “Just let it go.”
This is another way of telling the person that their experiences are not valid and that they should just forget about them. This can prevent the person from working through their trauma and could make them feel worse.
3. “You’re being too sensitive.”
This is dismissive and insulting. It makes the person feel like their reactions are unreasonable and that they should just toughen up. This can prevent the person from seeking help or opening up about their experiences.
It wasn’t that bad, was it?
If you are close to someone with CPTSD, it is important to be mindful of your words and avoid making any dismissive or hurtful remarks. Instead, try to offer support and understanding. If you’re not sure what to say, simply letting your loved one know that you are there for them can make a world of difference.
That happened in the past, why are you still upset?
When someone discloses to you that they have complex PTSD, it is important to be respectful and provide support. It is not helpful to tell them that what happened was in the past and they should be over it. This can invalidate their experiences and make them feel like they are not being heard or understood.
Complex PTSD is a serious mental health condition that can have a profound impact on every aspect of a person’s life. It can cause intense feelings of guilt, shame, and worthlessness, as well as problems with trust, intimacy, and relationships. Complex PTSD can also lead to substance abuse, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts or behaviors.
If someone you know has complex PTSD, the best thing you can do is offer your support and understanding. Let them know that you are there for them and believe them when they talk about their experiences. Avoid telling them how they should feel or what they should do; instead, focus on listening non judgmentally and providing emotional validation.
Calm down
When someone is in the middle of a complex PTSD reaction, their body and mind are in a state of high arousal. This means that they are more likely to be on edge, feeling jumpy and easily startled. Their heart rate may be increased and they may be sweating or shaking. They may also have trouble thinking clearly or concentrating.
Telling someone to calm down in this state can actually increase their anxiety and make it harder for them to calm down on their own. It can also make them feel like you don’t understand what they’re going through or that you don’t believe them when they say they’re feeling overwhelmed.
Instead of telling someone with complex PTSD to calm down, try saying something like, “I see that you’re really upset right now” or “It sounds like this is really hard for you.” These statements show that you understand what the person is going through and can validate their experience.
You’re too much right now
It’s easy to get overwhelmed when dealing with someone with complex PTSD. They may be feeling a range of intense emotions and may be behaving in ways that are confusing or challenging. It’s important to be supportive, but there are some things you should avoid saying.
Here are four things you should never say to someone with complex PTSD:
1. “You’re too much right now.”
This phrase invalidates the person’s feelings and suggests that they are not valid or important. It can make the person feel like they need to suppress their emotions in order to be acceptable, which can lead to further distress.
2. “I don’t know how you cope.”
This statement implies that the person is somehow stronger or better than others for managing their symptoms. It also puts pressure on the individual to have all the answers about their condition, which is unrealistic and unfair. What’s more, it minimises the difficulties they face on a daily basis.
What’s wrong with you?
It’s not polite to ask someone what’s wrong with them, and it’s even less appropriate to do so if you suspect they may have complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD). While it’s understandable that you might want to know what someone with CPTSD is struggling with, this question can be intrusive and overwhelming. It also suggests that you think there must be something “wrong” with them, which can further invalidate their experiences.
If you’re curious about someone’s mental health, it’s best to ask how they’re doing in a general sense, rather than specifically inquire about their diagnosis. You can also let them know that you’re there for them if they ever want to talk about what they’re going through. Ultimately, though, it’s up to the individual whether or not they want to share their experiences with you.
I don’t believe anything you’re saying
There is a lot that someone with complex PTSD (CPTSD) may not want to hear from you. They may feel like they are constantly under attack, and that people are out to get them. They may be paranoid and distrustful of everyone, including you. So, it’s important to be careful about what you say to someone with CPTSD. Here are some things you should avoid saying:
1. “I don’t believe anything you’re saying.”
This can come across as dismissive and invalidating. It can make the person feel like their experiences and feelings are not real or worth your time. This can be extremely hurtful and discouraging, making it even harder for the person to recover from their trauma.
2. “You’re just looking for attention.”
Again, this is invalidating and dismisses the person’s experiences and feelings. It also suggests that they are somehow responsible for their own trauma or that they deserve it in some way. This is untrue and unfair, and will only make the person feel worse about themselves.. 3.”You’re overreacting.” 4.”It’s not that bad.” 5.”Calm down.” 6.”Just let it go.” 7.”Stop dwelling on the past/thinking about it so much.””.
You are crazy. You are dramatic
If someone tells you that you are crazy or dramatic, it is likely that they do not understand what you are dealing with. Complex PTSD is a serious condition that can have a profound impact on your life. It is important to remember that you are not alone in dealing with this condition and there are many others who understand what you are going through.